she was sifting through and cataloging data at B.O.O.B.S. (the ‘Benevolent Order Of Butt Savers’, in case you forgot) secret headquarters located in a cavern hidden (because it is secret) abreast and betwixt the twin peaks of the Grand Teatons (it all goes ‘down hill’ from here, folks [*groan* even I thought that was bad]), so called, due to it’s odd rock formations.
(Note: the udder beauty of this pair of magnificent mounds can be viewed further, much further, below.)
(Note: the udder beauty of this pair of magnificent mounds can be viewed further, much further, below.)
She just received a call from one of her school mates and colleague, ‘Stuffy’ over at Gloomyvale High. Stuffy had gotten word from her bf Angle (a reformed blood sucker, no not a leech, yes a vampire) that there was a potentially paranormal problem at a place called Sidney Manor. She, Angle, Dander, Maple and another rehabilitated vampire named Stake (never a good name for a Vampire, btw), were on the prom and graduation committees, not to mention dealing with another Hell Mouth, this one new and improved, opening in Gloomyvale, so would be unable to handle the situation.
She said she had spoken to her guidance counselor, Pubert E. Biles, about the case, but he was unable to offer any advice, as he was presently involved in a very serious ‘Head’ to head ‘Shites & Bladders’ competition against the world reigning champion, Leslie WinDamn ‘at any’ Price.
HELLdin said she would do what she could. Battling the paranormal was not really her, nor the B.O.O.B.S., forte, so she thought she’d try calling a few other associates who were more capable in handling such matters.
She said she had spoken to her guidance counselor, Pubert E. Biles, about the case, but he was unable to offer any advice, as he was presently involved in a very serious ‘Head’ to head ‘Shites & Bladders’ competition against the world reigning champion, Leslie WinDamn ‘at any’ Price.
HELLdin said she would do what she could. Battling the paranormal was not really her, nor the B.O.O.B.S., forte, so she thought she’d try calling a few other associates who were more capable in handling such matters.
So who was she gonna call? The Toastdusters, of course. Their motto ‘ashes to ashes, toast and/or dust...’em!’ She punched in their number. Dr. Nayman Cantz answered (hey, it’s tough to come up with this stuff, ya know!) Unfortunately he, Dr. Peter Wankman, Dr. Dagon Dangler and Piston Zedless were now in retirement and had to sell off all their equipment at a yard sale. Gone were the PKE meters, ecto goggles and even the Ecto 1.
They did have a couple of Proton Packs and a trap left, which they were welcomed to, but the Ecto Containment Unit Reactor-
They did have a couple of Proton Packs and a trap left, which they were welcomed to, but the Ecto Containment Unit Reactor-
had been sold to the Kodiak Corporation in Rochester, N.Y. It was kept in a very secure basement there, so if anything ecto-ish was capture it would have to be taken there for confinement. IF they were allowed access, that is.
HELLdin thanked them for their offer and asked could they send the equipment a.s.a.p.
HELLdin thanked them for their offer and asked could they send the equipment a.s.a.p.
Next she tried her dear friends, the Remington sisters, Pam and Jean. They too were booked, yes, another completely different Hell Mouth had opened, along with various demons, hell hounds, revolting angels (since God has been away on business elsewhere in the aether), prophets and whatnot, so they were a no show.
Thus, with no affiliates left that were trained in such matters, she sent a text to her fellow B.O.O.B.S.
Thus, with no affiliates left that were trained in such matters, she sent a text to her fellow B.O.O.B.S.
The first one to get back to her was Sir Seymour Chapbottom. He gave his apologies, but< :) was currently on the trail of the infamous Italian villain, Giardia Lamblini who had been ‘rashly’ spreading quite unpleasant conditions across 5 states.
Next to return her text was MadMadigan the Merciless. She sent this-
Next to return her text was MadMadigan the Merciless. She sent this-
yes, she now battles pink Olifonts!
The Professor of Pandemonic Pain, sent his regards, but regretted being busy with cloning experiments at the moment and could not get away, though he graciously offered sending a replican’t of his ASsIStant Fankie Gore, but warned there were some slight glitches not yet worked out and he could not guarantee the repligore would not go berserk and cannibalize everyone.
The Mysterious Warrior of Mysteriousness was unable to be contacted due to being mysteriously nowhere and everywhere.
The Professor of Pandemonic Pain, sent his regards, but regretted being busy with cloning experiments at the moment and could not get away, though he graciously offered sending a replican’t of his ASsIStant Fankie Gore, but warned there were some slight glitches not yet worked out and he could not guarantee the repligore would not go berserk and cannibalize everyone.
The Mysterious Warrior of Mysteriousness was unable to be contacted due to being mysteriously nowhere and everywhere.
Olaf the Awful had returned to his own country and was now a Sous Chef for a famous culinary artist, a grand gourmet cuisinier.
Mlle. Maque ‘the knife’ Inbaque had taken up with a new group, and was never herd from again.
That only left Death Maul and FarLich the Formidable.
After they finally deciphered HELLdin’s text, they sent their own-
Mlle. Maque ‘the knife’ Inbaque had taken up with a new group, and was never herd from again.
That only left Death Maul and FarLich the Formidable.
After they finally deciphered HELLdin’s text, they sent their own-
When they arrived, and the equipment was loaded into the van. Schnecke volunteered *coughinsistedcough* to drive, since he had recently gotten his permit and needed actual behind the wheel experience.
So they all got aboard the BOOBSmobile, renamed ‘The Mysterious Mechanism’ by The Mysterious Warrior of Mysteriousness (thus the pink Shurikens)....
...and off they went to battle a new adversary, who, or what, they would soon find out.
(Yeah, I know, it's bad and will only get worse....)
To be continued.....
(Yeah, I know, it's bad and will only get worse....)
To be continued.....